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On Parenting

Warning: This post will have nothing to do with reading. Absolutely nothing! It’ll just be a somewhat lengthy rant (#RamblingThoughts) about my vision on parenting.

Now I know that I’m not the best person to be talking about parenting because (1) I’m not a parent, (2) The only thing I had to do with parenting was babysitting my little sisters for a few hours when my mom wasn’t there and that was at least five years ago so I know nothing about what it’s like and what it takes and (3) Just the idea of being a parent scares me. So no, being a parent is not my thing and I am in no way trying to teach parenting! I just cannot accept seeing some people who behave so badly with children to be in their charge. The reason why being a parent scares me is because it’s lots of responsibilities coming at you from everywhere and I do not know if I can manage to deal with them and I cannot risk having a baby while not ensuring that I can really really really take care of him and provide.

I may sound a bit frustrated but the reason is: Yesterday, I went to a coffeeshop in Casablanca and sat outside because it was too crowded where I was usually sitting inside and I just couldn’t handle the noise. Soon after that, a family came to the table right next to me. First Imane-being-very-maternal thoughts: “Aww, look at that sweet baby! And his parents are still young. They must be so in love, he’s so lucky!”. Little did I know that a few seconds later, they were both going to take their cigarettes out and start smoking in front of their baby. Now I know that addiction is hard and you can’t stop yourself but please leave the baby out of it! He didn’t make that choice. You’re forcing your bad choices into his lungs, literally! What happened to babies’ needs over your needs? Smoking was, of course, not enough. The father had to get into a fight with the waiter. Anger issues much? And the baby was just left by himself crying while the mother was trying to  make her husband calm down.

Parenting isn’t easy. Disciplining kids isn’t easy. Making mistakes again and again is normal but not mistakes that will permanently harm your own child’s physical and mental health. Unless you’ve been living in a cave, thousands of research papers prove the harm done by second-hand smoke and showing that much anger in front of a baby can fire up his stress levels that may cause him so much trouble in the future and that’s even when you’re thinking “Ah well, he’s just a baby! He won’t understand what’s going on.”, so deliberately hurting your child is wrong and this right here should be considered as abuse if it isn’t already. Babies and children shouldn’t have to sacrifice their health and themselves in general in order for you to be comfortable. It’s the other way around! And this is just an example of all the things I’ve seen careless parents do. I know that there are kids in far worse conditions. I know that there are headlines all over the world mentioning the cruelty of some “people” who call themselves parents and that’s just horrible because if a child isn’t safe with his own parents, what chances could he possibly have in this world?

Parenting isn’t for everyone. Parenting is for people who are ready to face reality, be selfless and welcome their babies without thinking twice about all the sacrifices to be made. Or at least, this is how I think parenting should look like because it is no hobby, it is a job.

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